World Cup of Kits (Group H)

The final group, and an interesting one for sure. There is one fairly clear runaway and then two teams battling for the second spot. One of the more competitive groups even though there aren't any true powerhouses.

Group  H: Portugal, Ghana, Uruguay, South Korea

Portugal: 

There is nothing truly spectacular about these kits, but also nothing to make me dislike them. In this group that ends up being a great thing. I think these are also a little lazy… and while there is STILL an Inter collar on this kit, it's more of a “Where’s Waldo” and less of a “we ran out of ideas.”

The red kit is just a solid red shirt with a diagonal split and green underneath. The red and green are a great combination and NIKE doesn’t make it look bad here. But I am not super impressed either. I like it, but I don’t like that I like it. It’s simple on the border of boring. A great color combo with not great not bad execution.

As far as the white kits go, I’ve really liked this cream color that Portugal has gone to in recent years, and I think it pairs really well with their red and green. Again there’s nothing about this kit that really jumps out at me, but it's also just pretty well done. The mostly red with slight green bar also adds something so that it is not too plain.

Overall, these are somehow the best kit combination in the group and they get three wins against three verrrrry mediocre sides.

Results: W against Ghana, W against Uruguay, W against South Korea. Advance in first place with 9 points!

Ghana: 

I cannot wait for the Ghana vs. Suarez rematch (fuck that guy) and all the story lines that will go with it coming into this group stage in real life. They’re even playing in the last match of the stage where there will definitely be at least some knockout stage implications, and may be one of the most dramatic matches in the cup.

The difference between that game and this one will be the quality of the kits. Unfortunately for both countries, they decided to go with Puma, who has wrecked everything they’ve touched this year. I really enjoyed the yellow and red striped ones and the white and black kits that Ghana wore on its dream run to the Quarters in 2010, even though they broke my heart as a United States resident.

These are not those kits. The red kit features what looks to be a postal stamp, which at first I didn’t mind, but has grown more and more out of place for me. I like the colors and if they had just not put that God awful box in the middle, they would’ve maybe had something. 

I do like the white kit. I won't lie. I like the black star and how it is the focal point. I also think the finishing on the sleeve works really well.

Overall though, the combination is not good enough to get by Portugal, or a really solid red kit from South Korea. I couldn’t bring myself to have them lose to Uruguay so they get a draw there (which is honestly fair).

Results: L against Portugal, L against South Korea, TIE against Uruguay. Do not advance in 4th with 1 point.

Uruguay: 

The last Puma kit and the last giant out-of-place box in the middle of a shirt for some reason. I think it’s back to the drawing board for the base designer from Puma (if they keep their job). They were lucky to have a team with a historic blue and black kit that is literally impossible to mess up.

Let’s start with the bad one, the white kit has that dumbass base design with another calendar-looking centerpiece. I don’t understand who thought this was a good idea. The gold adds a little bit to it but not enough for me not to hate it.

The light blue and black has been a staple for Uruguay since they were the very first team to win a World Cup. Will they repeat that success in the kit competition? Absolutely not. I don’t have anything negative to say about the baby blues, but I hate the white enough for the both of them.

Uruguay gets slightly edged out by a South Korea team who, like them, has one out of two good kits. They tie in their match against the tigers. But it’s Uruguay's inability to be significantly better than Ghana that keeps them back.

Results: TIE against Korea, L against Portugal, TIE against Ghana. 2 Points, do not advance in 3rd.

South Korea: 

South Korea’s kits, much like their flag, are a tale of duality. Yin and Yang if you will. The red kit is great, I love it. The black kit is… something. There’s a reason those lads in the black are hiding back there (bros think we can’t see them).

This time we’ll start with the good. These red kits are beautiful. The tiger stripes on the shoulders along with the black collar create something really satisfying. The only complaint I have with these is that they are kind of like England in that they are a tiny bit monochromatic. I think black shorts would put these up in S tier with Mexico’s whites and Japan’s blues. I also think the incorporation of the logo works wonderfully here.

What the hell are the black ones though. What were they going for? Apparently they represent the relationship between heaven (blue) and earth (red) and okayyyy… but how does that explain the yellow? I’m lost with these and I think they look like something you would find on the seat of a bus, or the floor of an arcade. They’re creative. I'll give them that, but they are certainly not my favorite in this competition.

Overall, South Korea advances on the skill of their red kit, and their ability to beat Ghana straight up in spite of their black outer galaxy kits.

Results: TIE against Uruguay, W against Ghana, L against Portugal. Advance in Second place of this group with 4 points.

Overall Results